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Neil Miller March 23, 2015 Filed Under: #GreyIsWhite, #PowerPlays, #ThinSkinned, #TimeIsEternal, On the Job

How to Ruin Your Relationships in India

Runining Relationships

 

You repeatedly email and call an old contact who won’t reply or pick up.

The manager of your Indian operations suddenly quits for no apparent reason.

You get a legal notice in your office mailbox.

 

Even though Relational Capital can be straightforward to build, it can be a pain to maintain. And worse, it can all come crashing down very quickly. Months or years of effort can be reduced to nothing in what seems like an instant.

Sometimes it is necessary to intentionally end a business relationship in India, such as calling out a vendor who is using unscrupulous practices. But more often, you will find yourself bankrupt in Relational Capital with someone without a clue as to why. Relational Capital is high-risk/high-reward and can be a dangerous game to play.

Thankfully, there are patterns in the ways that outsiders lose all their relational investments, and you can learn from those of us who have lost more than we have gained. The following items are character traits that most Indians hate about other people, particularly outsiders. [Read more…]

Neil Miller March 2, 2015 Filed Under: #PowerPlays, #See1See100, On the Job, Podcast, Team Management

Episode 6: Jessica Kumar

Podcast

Starting points are pretty varied in India.

You are a man in your 50s who is coming in as the CEO of a new division.

You are a retired woman in your 60s who is ready to start a new adventure.

You are a young married couple getting some international exposure in your roles.

 

Each starting place comes with its own challenges; you must learn where you fit in Indian society and what rules apply to you. It takes time to learn these and some are easier than others.

But hands-down, the hardest of all the starting points is the young unmarried female manager.

Everything is leveraged against her. Indian management is still dominated by men (although this is slowly changing). Socially, most people are more concerned if she is going to get married soon than if she is capable of doing a good job. Because she is young and female, it is an uphill battle in nearly every relationship for her to get respect from people reporting to her without coming across as extremely rude and conceited.

So, I’m always amazed when I hear of a woman who made it work.

 

This month’s Working With India podcast features Jessica Kumar. She came to work in northern India as a young woman in her early 20s. She worked as a team-lead in several functions and got deeply involved in the culture and work life of India.

 

Here’s why you need to listen to this podcast:

  • Jessica is one of the few outsiders who completely embraced language learning and is fluent in Hindi. (She shares some great tips.)
  • She has perhaps the best advice for anyone trying to find their place in Indian society, regardless of their starting point.
  • She’s married to an Indian, and intimately knows the ins and outs of a joint family (though her first exposure might surprise you).
  • If you don’t listen to her story about how she learned a cultural lesson the hard way, you are likely to repeat it yourself.

Here was my favorite quote from the show: “If you pick a particular role or way people see you, it generally sticks for life.” Listen now to understand what she means.

You can listen in the player below, or subscribe on iTunes.

 

(A quick note on the audio – we had to switch to a phone about 10 minutes into our conversation, so you will notice that the sound quality changes all of a sudden.)

 

Here’s where you can find more from Jessica:

  • Her blog – globalnomadism.com
  • The article she references in the show:
  • Some of her articles elsewhere:
    • Making a point with Interracial Marriage
    • ‘Firangi Bahu’: Does it really represent Indian/Western marriages?
    • 3 Reasons Why We Need to Change Our Minds About Bihar

 

http://media.blubrry.com/workingwithindia/p/podcast.learningindia.in.s3-website-us-east-1.amazonaws.com/Episodes/Ep6JessicaKumar.mp3

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Arjun Buxi February 23, 2015 Filed Under: #ChaosBeatsLogic, #CustomerIsAlwaysThere, #GreyIsWhite, #PowerPlays, Daily Living

The Art of ‘Jugaad’: Everyday Life

Editor’s Note: Today is the first guest post on LearningIndia.in. I’ve asked Arjun ‘John’ Buxi to give us a few articles to understand what Jugaad is and how to use it. 

 

Jugaad Monkey

 

Problem. Obvious solution. Better life.

Simple, right? But everyone in India knows it’s not always like that.

Take Rhesus monkeys for example. For years now, these monkeys have been entering neighborhoods, stealing food, and even harming people. Simple response, right? Get rid of the monkeys. Not so easy!

The monkey in India is associated with the Hindu god, Hanuman, who is depicted as a monkey king and devotee of Rama, protagonist of the Ramayana epic. Because many folks see the monkey as holy, the Municipal Government is a bit loath to ‘take care’ of the problem, and people continue to feed the monkeys. Sure, you could buy an ultrasonic monkey repellant, but they are too expensive for most folks. So what can ‘Average Joe’ do? [Read more…]

Neil Miller February 2, 2015 Filed Under: #PowerPlays, #ThinSkinned, Communication, On the Job, Podcast, Team Management

Episode 5: Robert Stephens

Podcast

I’m constantly amazed at the paths people take to India.

Some people get called into an office one day and find themselves in an Indian airport the next week. Others come here trying to start their own business and capitalize on the Indian market. Others come to live out a sense of adventure.

Then there’s Robert. [Read more…]

http://media.blubrry.com/workingwithindia/p/podcast.learningindia.in/Episodes/Ep5Stephens.mp3

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Neil Miller January 20, 2015 Filed Under: #ChaosBeatsLogic, #PowerPlays, #See1See100, #ThinSkinned, #TimeIsEternal, Daily Living

13 ways to be a gracious god in India

Being a good god

Marty was a bit nervous about his first trip to India. He was visiting a team he had worked with for a few months, and was delivering some additional training to them.

A driver with Marty’s name greeted him at the airport and tried to take Marty’s bags. Marty felt a mix of suspicion and do-it-yourself-ness, and got into a small tug-of-war match to take his bags away from the driver.

When he walked into the office after freshening up, the entire office stood up with smiles to greet him. Marty gave a mostly blank look and tried to quickly find a place to set his things down. The head of the office came and asked if he’d like to join him for tea. “No thank you, I’ve got to get a few things organized here first,” Marty said.

After getting settled, the team took Marty out to lunch. On the way, Marty said he was still feeling a little jet-lagged and wasn’t very hungry. After looking over the menu, Marty selected a single bowl of soup. “Don’t you want some rice or Indian breads?”, the team asked. “No thank you, I’m trying to watch my carbs and my wife says I need to eat less gluten.” [Read more…]

Neil Miller January 12, 2015 Filed Under: #GreyIsWhite, #PowerPlays, #See1See100, #ThinSkinned, #TimeIsEternal, Daily Living, On the Job

How to Recover from Offending Someone in India

Offended Bird

You made a careless phrase.

…or you forgot to cc someone on an email.

…or you unknowingly made a senior person look bad.

…or the hint of sarcasm in your email wasn’t taken the right way.

…or you forgot to invite someone to a meeting.

 

If you stick around India long enough, it’s not a question of if, but when you offend someone.Therefore, instead of discussing how to avoid it, let’s talk about how to recover from it. [Read more…]

Neil Miller January 5, 2015 Filed Under: #ChaosBeatsLogic, #GreyIsWhite, #PowerPlays, #ThinSkinned, Parent Leadership, Podcast, Team Management

Episode 4: Arjun Buxi

Podcast

You have identified an ideal partner for your business in India: strong financials, common interests, and experience in the field. The company is an older family-run business. You soon realize that the key to sealing an agreement is a meeting with the patriarch, an older man who doesn’t come to the office much anymore. His blessing is essential, but you are having a lot of trouble getting his attention. What do you do?

In this episode of Working With India, I talk with Arjun Buxi. Arjun is a native Indian who grew up in a Punjabi family business, and is now a Communication Consultant and Educator in the San Francisco area. Arjun is a true expert in the field of Indian business culture, especially when it comes to how family dynamics affect things. His knowledge is both experiential and scholarly.

Here are a few of my favorite moments in this show:

  • What an HUF is and why it’s central to understanding Indian business
  • How to ‘investigate the hierarchy’ of an Indian family business #PowerPlays
  • Practical tips on how to correct someone of higher status than you #ThinSkinned
  • Really insightful rules for gift-giving
  • Why Jugaad is essential for your ability to navigate Indian businesses #GreyisWhite, #ChaosBeatsLogic

Here are some of the links mentioned in the show: [Read more…]

http://media.blubrry.com/workingwithindia/p/podcast.learningindia.in/Episodes/Ep4Buxi.mp3

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

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Neil Miller December 29, 2014 Filed Under: #PowerPlays, Parent Leadership

The Dark Side of Parent Leadership

Bad Parent Leadership

The story of a great parent is inspiring. The story of a dysfunctional one is depressing.

In the last article, we looked at the best version of a Parent Leader, or leaders who excel at paternalistic leadership. The key trait of a great Parent Leader is their ability to take a legacy approach. All the other good traits flow from a leader who has good vision and cares for his ‘family’.

But not all those who use a paternalistic leadership style are like Atticus Finch. Some are more like Homer Simpson.

Here are some classic traits of really dysfunctional Parent Leaders.

 

They never relinquish any authority. Dysfunctional Parent Leaders don’t fully trust anyone to work independently of their wisdom and guidance. Therefore, they never fully give any authority. While they may have several VPs around them, they all much check in with Mom/Dad before they blink an eye. Decisions taken independently are either seen as an act of rebellion or a declaration that you are ‘too good’ for the family. [Read more…]

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© Neil A. Miller, LearningIndia.in, and Madras Media Marketing LLC 2013-2015. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given.